Another publisher's ad on a more recent book:

Want to read more about real-life pirates from Nova Scotia's nautical past?

Funny you should ask. The other day I happened to be thinking to myself, “You know, I really don't want to read more about real-life pirates from Nova Scotia's nautical past”, so the answer to your query must be a reluctant yet firm “no”. These books tend to be full of lies and junk. Nobody really knows much about the actual pirate activities in these parts, as it's mostly conjecture.

Anyway, I'm sick of pirates. Why do people think they might be interesting? You could just as well write exciting tales about shoplifters. How come there aren't any of those?