Loser's Guide to Life
Scamming a free coffee at “Perk's”? How low can you go?
Older, uncoordinated guy in shorts trying to redeem a coffee card, strangely full of pencilled check marks instead of the coffee shop's official stamp.
(The deal is if you're a frequent customer, they give you a card with spaces to be stamped each time you buy a coffee, and six purchases or so entitle the bearer to a free coffee.)
However, it appeared as though someone had merely checked off the spaces with a pencil, so the staff refused it. The man left.
A bit later the man's wife phoned to say that she had taken it upon herself to check off the spaces on this new card to account for the credit on several coffee cards the man had lost.
Where do we go from here?
I started wondering about this doddering man, sent out by his wife with a bogus coffee card.
“There you are. Go down to 'Perk's' and they'll give you a free coffee.”
“But but but wha happens if like—”
“No, it's free. See how I've checked off all those boxes? Because of the ones you went and lost? Then the next one says 'Free Med. Coffee'. Just make sure you show it to them, and point out that they're to give you a free coffee.”
“Yeah but they might think I'm just like cheating or or—”
“Stop being such a gaby. You're ridiculous, put your hat on and get out there.”